Fear Over Tear!
O.2008.6.5.r.7ahj.L4.Office

Fear is leading!
Fear progressed through me, this year!
Fear (Pr.3:5-6) is becoming my heart of revolution!

Fear, at best, grew in me during this school-year, while serving in Revolution Hawaii!

Fear, via the direction of reverence and responsibility, is beginning to remodel my very character, reaching to the depths of my integrity.

Fear, at best, initiates my bravery, progression, and servanthood! The realm of joy is favored over fear: yet, somehow, I am changing my mind about that. As we speak, I am thinking over this year, and I am praying for change. Obama is promoting change, I understand. I also understand that change, at best, derives from the roots of maturity, godliness, desire! By the way, the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom! Still, how often will I become enslaved within fearing people, circumstances, or especially myself. I'm begining to fear over the freedom of running and hiding. I am beginning to back away from irresponsibility, excuses, or even the pledge to ignorance. Fear, at best, is beginning to focus my drive. I understand that this definition of fear, in majority, differs from normality, the initial view of running and hiding. Somehow, I believe that fear, within the guidance of morality, fires up bravery. Fear, normally, seems timid, heartless, and purposeless. However, fear seems to be the cornerstone of integrity.

Fear is the heart of integrity!
Fear is my accountability, discipleship, and drive!

Fear, in the room of integrity, guides me away from disaster. I mean, fear is going to stop me from making a mess of myself. Fear is changing my words over uttering that a girl is ugly, that another girl is a dog, that a guy is a timid cat snake who hates kids, that a hawk cannot fly. Fear is remodeling my words, thoughts, actions. Fear initiates carefulness. Joy then drives that to bravery. The joy of the Lord is our strength, bravery, and drive. How will I stay calm in the mist of struggle? Fear can change my perspective, vision, and character. Fear is beginning to get me to stop what I must not do. Fear is telling me that I am heading towards the cliff. Fear is telling me of my potential, and is asking for my responsibility and drive. Remember that we cannot do anything without the fear that comes from the heart of our Savior, and the joy which comes from the hands of the Creator. I need that fear to get me up in the morning. I need to be silent, in reverence (fear) of my Sustainer. The early bird gets the worm. Rejuvenation starts in our quiet time with Jesus. That Man is my most favorite Savior, at best. It is so sweet that I can hang with the Lover of my soul. Fear is teaching me to spend time with my Teacher, Father, Friend, Brother, and Protector! Fear is the trunk to love (God is Love, by the way). This fear leads me to joy, which parallels eternal perspective vision! This summer, at camp, I get to be a rolemodel to the youth in Oregon, in the woods, in our Wilderness program. Last year, at camp, they would love my testimony. Brothers and sisters, my testimony has made a twist and turn in my life. Fear has surpassed many of my previous paradigms, mindsets, concepts, or blueprints to life.

Fear is the trunk to love!
Fear is remodeling me to availability!
Fear is guiding me to wait but live life, to be still!
Fear initiates vision, and joy jumpstarts me to driving!

Fear is what I learned, at best, during my mission year. I would rather say that I learned the art of joy. Instead, I sense that fear must be the root to joy, drive, and progression. I have a hard time writing about all this. I have several more days in Hawaii. I have learned so much. I have done so much. I never raised all of my support financially, and I pray that I can get out of debt (I like fear this, too). Still, it was a wonderful year full of struggle and joyful progression. This is where I am right now. I am looking forwards to the summer. I wished I was more available for everything in Hawaii. We ministered to the homeless, youth, and marginalized. This is an impressive resume (the hawk). I love that I was able to love God by loving others. I cannot emphasize that too much. I want to thank all my fans (just kidding). I want to thank all my loyal friends. The bad fear does haunt me, a few times, questioning my path, this fall. Instead of fearing the path, doubts, and uncertainties of this summer and fall, I must take my eyes to Jesus. I am not sure if I can go to WYI (a special Bible retreat), because I have camp that week. Fear, of the Lord over things, is asking me to not let such things stop me from living out the joy of the Lord! I was at this Men's Camp, last weekend, and it was so encouraging. I have a cold and sore throat, right now. I have a lot of things I want to do. But fear is hugging me, right now, begging me to put God first. And to spread the word about God's grace, forgiveness, and miracle working hands. I am working on a paper on my year with Revolution Hawaii. I am seeking change and humility. I am working on my personality and character. I want to focus on character over personality. I am seeking better rest, diet, health, and exercise. I am beginning to seek teamwork, togetherness, and maturity.

Fear is hugging my heart!
Fear is transforming my character over personality!
I am excited about the future, and ready to be part of His story!